Lately I've been getting a lot of those crazy spam letters from Nigeria asking for money. I got to thinking, that they must be working, otherwise they would stop sending them. So why not start an Internet fundraising campaign for my new musicals? Perhaps it would go something like this:

Attn: Please,

I am so very sorry if I pried into your privacy but due to your honesty, I am convinced that you would be capable to provide me with a solution. I am Suzy Conn Book / Lyrics / Music writer of PLANE CRAZY. I am writing on behalf of my musical PLANE CRAZY, a successful show from your country whose investment died unfortunately in an air mishap in July 2000.

I am contacting you simply to assist in claiming the deposited assets valued at 5,500,000.00 Euros before it gets confiscated by the Netherlands Bank. The Bank has written me as the consultant and issued a final notice to provide any other investors or have the assets channel to the Netherlands National Treasury as unclaimed fund within the next 10 working days.

Since there was no investors left in our record, I seek your consent to present you as its only surviving investor, so that this funds can be paid to you. Therefore, on receipt of your expression of interest (EOI), I have agreed that you will inherit 45% of this fund for your help and sincerity, 45% for my musical capitalization (including additional workshops) while 10% for the refunds of processing expenses and to pay tax in your country (if any) upon successful confirmation of this funds in your bank account. Thereafter, all the related legal documents will be destroyed and we part ways.

Since I have been unsuccessful in locating support, my aim now is to usher you in legally as an investor since you are of the same nationality so that the fruit of my labour will not be in vain. All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable us see this transaction through. I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of law. Please urgently reply if you can handle it. I'll also get you opening night tickets.

Best Regards,

Suzy Conn
Book / Lyrics / Music Writer
PLANE CRAZY

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